Courage to Change

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The world is large, and there can be many dark places full of challenges, and obstacles, and setbacks to overcome. But with courage, we offer ourselves a choice, and a light to get us through.

It doesn’t take much: a single thought, a single word, a single spark- and our world ignites. Because courage is about moving forward in spite of fears and doubts. It’s about accepting what your heart is telling you. And it’s about taking a risk, even when you don’t know what will come next.

So shine a light on the shadows, and reveal what you need to see. It will be hard. But it will be amazing. And it will be beautiful. There is no easy path, but there is a worthwhile one. And if you really look, you will find the courage you need. It will be there, with each and every act of bravery you take. – “Courage”, written and compiled by Amelia Riedler.

I chose two words for this year (2019), one was Courage. To step out of my fears, anxieties, insecurities and to venture out to spread my wings so that I could find more Joy, my second word. As you may have read in my other posts, I started embracing my story 15 months ago and it’s been a scary journey, but worth it with the personal growth that’s come from it. Let me tell you, personal growth is one of the most difficult things to go through. It’s necessary, but it’s not easy. When you grow, the people and things around you can change. It’s not all bad. There’s a lot of clarity that comes with growth as well.

So, I found this book “Courage” at our local FedEx Kinko’s. It’s a simple book, but so much of it resonates with me and it made me think of things to write about regarding courage.
Courage is a word that had a deep meaning, and impact. The Oxford dictionary defines courage as a noun: 1) the ability to do something that frightens one. 2) strength in the face of pain or grief. Merriam-Webster defines courage as ‘mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty.”

In embracing my story, that took courage. It took courage to endure all of the things that I’ve been through in my life, which started at a very young age with people who were close to me, who were supposed to protect me, therefore, setting me on a path that would cause me to endure more pain and heartache. It’s so funny because so many times in my life people have told me how courageous I am, and I never saw myself as courageous. I thought courageous meant that I had to do something great, of meaning, like a superhero. When I thought of courageous people, I thought of police officers and fire fighters, it takes real courage to do those jobs and save lives. Who the heck was I to be called courageous, surviving sexual abuse, and domestic violence? I’ve never thought of myself as having a victim mentality, but I did feel stupid and less than when people would tell me how courageous I am. I belittled myself because I ‘let’ those things happen to me.

I don’t belittle myself now and I know I didn’t let those things happen. There are just people in this world that want to make you feel small and less than, so they abuse you in some way and it makes them feel better, more powerful. Today, I have clarity. I was and am courageous in all I’ve been through.

That’s why I’m writing my book, to share that courage, and give encouragement and hope to others who cannot see it for themselves.

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